Umwali yari nk’amata ntiyasogongerwaga
Mu muco wa Kinyarwanda cyaraziraga kikanaziririzwa ko umwari yiyandarika cyangwa agaragaraho imibonano mpuzabitsina atarashinga urugo rwe, niyo yabikoraga kuko kera nta dukingirizo twabagaho byamuviragamo akenshi gutwara inda z’indaro kandi byafatwaga nk’icyaha gikomeye, cyahanishwaga kujya kuroha nyirubwite.
Dr Rutangarwamaboko Modeste umuyobozi w’ikigo Nyarwanda cy’ubuzima bushingiye ku muco, akaba n’umuganga w’inararibonye mu mitekerereze, imigirire n’imyitwarire y’abantu (Psycologue) mu kiganiro na Kigalitoday, yatangaje imyitwarire yarangaga umwari ndetse n’umusore wa Kera, anerekana bimwe mu bibatera gusamara no gutandukira indangagaciro zabarangaga mu gihe cya kera.
Yagize ati: “Mu gihe cya kera umwari yarangwaga no kwigengesera ntasamare ngo yiyandarike, akarangwa n’ibikorwa byiza, birimo gutegura mu rugo, kuboha ibiseke, koza ibyansi agatunganya uruhimbi n’ibindi bikorwa byiza byatumaga bamuranga, bakamurangira undi muryango bashingiye ku bikorwa bye by’ubupfura, bakaza kumurambagiriza umusore wabo, atanamuzi”.
Mu gihe cya kera kandi nkuko Dr Rutangarwamaboko abivuga, umusore nawe yarigengeseraga agakomera ku bumanzi bwe ntasambane, aho ibikorwa by’umukobwa ndetse n’ingeso nziza ze yabwirwaga n’abaranga, arizo zamukururaga, akajya gushaka nyirabyo.
Dr Rutangarwamaboko yanongeyeho kandi ko mu gihe cya kera umwari warengaga kuri ubu burere yahabwaga n’ababyeyi ndetse naba nyirasenge, akishora mu mibonano mpuzabitsina bikamuviramo gutwara inda y’indaro yarohwaga, kugirango bigaragarire umuryango wose ko yakoze amahano, adakwiye mu muryango Nyarwanda.
Yanatangaje kandi ko impamvu mu muco wa Kinyarwanda usanga ntacyo ukunze kuvuga ku muhungu wagaragayeho ayo makosa atari uko baba bamushyigikiye dore ko kera byari binagoye kumumenya, ahubwo umukobwa aba yarahawe impanuro na Nyina na Nyirasenge zihagije z’uko agapfundikiye gatera amatsiko, umukobwa nka nyiragaseke akaba agomba kugahoza gapfundikiye, akazagapfundura nyirako aje akamukwa.
Impamvu zitera abahungu n’abakobwa kwishora mu mibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo kurushinga
Mu gihe cy’ubu bigaragara ko gukora imibanano mpuzabitsina mbere yo ku rushinga bimaze kuba ibintu bisanzwe, kuko ibarura mibare ryakozwe hamwe na hamwe mu mirenge ndetse no mu masengero asezeranya abantu kuva mu kwa mbere 2006 kugeza mu kwa gatatu 2013, ryerekana ko hejuru ya 25% bazaga gusezerana batwite inda nkuru zigaragarira buri wese.
Dr Rutangarwamaboko akaba agaragaza impamvu nyamukuru yabonye, agendeye ku biganiro yagiye agirana n’urubyiruko rutandukanye rw’abasore n’inkumi.
Yagize ati: “Akenshi abakobwa bakunze kutavuga cyane ku bijyanye n’imibonano mpuzabitsina, ariko muri rusange cyane cyane mu rubyiruko naganiriye narwo, usanga mu myumvire yabo ari ukwirata ko barongoye cyangwa se bahaye abantu runaka b’igitangaza ko nuwo kanaka agiye gutwara, cyangwa ugiye kurongora runaka ariwe wamubanje, bigatuma abandi bumva ko uwakoze ibyo bintu ari umuntu w’umugabo ukwiye kwiganwa”.
Rutangarwamaboko atangaza ko ibyo bikorwa akenshi usanga biterwa n’urwiganwa rw’urubyiruko, aho usanga baba bavuga ko bacitswe n’ibyo abandi baba birata, hatirengagijwe ko abakobwa bashorwa mu mibonano mpuzabitsina bashukishwa amafaranga, imirimo n’utundi tuntu dutandukanye bitewe n’ubukene, ubushomeri no kubabeshya ko babakunda bishakira imibonano mpuzabitsina gusa.
Kuki mu gihe cy’ubu imibonano mpuzabitsina itagombye gukorwa mbere yo gushinga urugo?
Abanyarwandakazi kuko ingaruka zabyo aribo zigaragaraho mbere y’abagabo ; ntibakagombye gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo kurushinga, atari impamvu yo kwica umuco w’abakurambere gusa ahubwo ari no ku mpamvu yo kwiyubaha cyangwa kwirinda kwiyandarika.
Umwe mu bakobwa baganiriye na Kigalitoday utashatse ko izina rye ritangazwa, yatangaje ko iyo umukobwa yagaragayeho imibonano mpuza bitsina atararushinga afatwa nka biri hanze, akaba iciro ry’imigani, agata icyubahiro cyose cy’umwari agafatwa nk’umuntu wo kwiyambaza kugirango akemurire akabazo k’iminota ingahe umugabo, cyangwa umusore.
Akomeza avuga ko ikibabaje ari uko uwo yakemuriye ako kabazo atamwiyambaza ngo bashinge urugo kuko aba azi ko ari biri hanze uko yakamukemuriye, ari nako agakemurira n’abandi. Ibi bikaba byamukururira kutabona uwo bashingana urugo kubera isura aba afite hanze.
Yavuze kandi ko iyo umukobwa akoranye imibonano mpuzabitsina n’uwo bakundana batararushinga ; urukundo n’icyizere aba amufitiye bidakomeza kuzamuka ahubwo biragabanuka kuko ubusanzwe agapfundikiye gatera amatsiko, iyo ugapfunduye nta matsiko kaba kagiteye.
Umwe mu bahungu baganiriye na Kigalitoday nawe utashatse ko amazina ye ajya ahabona, yatangaje ko nta cyamwizeza ko uwo mukobwa uko akwemerera, atanemerera n’abandi, aribyo bituma rimwe na rimwe usanga abantu bakundana igihe kinini bagera igihe cyo gushinga urugo ugasanga birahindutse umwe aciye ukwe undi ukwe.
Abakobwa ubwabo kandi bemeza ko iyo umukobwa wamenyereye gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo kurushinga abonye umugabo; aguma amugereranya na babandi yamenyereye kuryamana nabo kuburyo bituma ashobora no kuba yaca inyuma umugabo we akajya kwishakira babandi yamenyereye, kuko umugabo we aba atamuhagije.
Abanyamadini babivugaho iki?
Benshi mu bagize umuryango nyarwanda babarizwa mu madini, kandi inyinshi mu nyigisho ziyatangirwamo, zirimo no kwirinda ubusambanyi cyane cyane kubatarashinga urugo, ndetse zinashishikariza ubudahemuka no kudacana inyuma, kubarushinze.
Ariane Mukankusi Umudiyakoni mu idini ry’Abadivantisiti b’umunsi wa Karindwi mu kiganiro na Kigalitoday, yatangaje ko uretse no mu idini, no mu muco bifuriza abari b’u Rwanda, bitagakwiye kuba bigaragaramo.
Yagize ati: “Twe mu badivantisiti, turabizira tukabiziririza gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo kurushinga nk’uko Imana ibiziririza mu mategeko yayo icumi, ndetse n’ubwo bitoroshye gutahura abasambanye utabafatiye mu cyuho, twashyizeho ivuriro ry’abadivantisite, ridufasha gupima abifuza kurushinga kugirango nidusanga hari utwite twe kubasezeranya”.
Ibi Mukankusi yabihurijeho na Pasiteri Kaberuka Celestin ubarizwa mu itorero rya Restoration Church, aho nawe atangaza ko ibi bidakwiye umwari w’u Rwanda ndetse n’umukobwa muri rusange, ko n’ababikora badakunze guhirwa mu rugo rwabo, kuko bigaragaza ko urukundo rwabo ruba rushingiye ku gitsina gusa, aho usanga bidatinze bamaze kurwubaka usanga abenshi bacana inyuma.
Iyo ikaba ariyo mpamvu, nabo babirwanya cyane cyane mu nyigisho batanga, ndetse banakangurira abakirisitu bo muri iri torero gukurikiza amategeko y’Imana ndetse no gukurikiza ingero z’abagiye batsinda iryo rari, banditse muri bibiriya.
Sheick Bishokaninkindi Daudi yatangaje ko muri Islam hari itegeko riziririza gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo ku rushinga, ndetse ko iyo ufashwe n’abantu bane bizeweho ubunyangamugayo, wowe n’uwo mwakoranye ubwo busambanyi mukubitwa ibiboko 80, 80, kugirango bigaragarire buri wese ko, icyo gikorwa muba mwakoze ari amahano mu idini ya Islam.
Amategeko yo abivugaho iki?
Amategeko, ni kimwe mu gikoresho cyifashishwa mu gutuma igihugu n’abagituye bigira umurongo ngenderwaho unogeye buri wese. Umuryango nyarwanda nawo ukaba ufite amategeko agenga imyitwarire n’imibarire y’abantu, mu rwego rwo kurwanya umwiryane wakomoka mu mibanire yabo.
Vital Migabo umunyamabanga nshingwabikorwa w’Umurenge wa Kinazi ho mu Karere ka Huye mu kiganiro na Kigalitoday, yatangaje ko ku rwego rw’ubuyobozi badashyigikira imibonano mpuzabitsina na gato ku batarashinga urugo ari byo abanyamadini bita ubusambanyi, ahubwo bashishikariza cyane abaturage ndetse n’amadini kongera imbaraga mu gutanga uburere bukwiye umwari w’u Rwanda.
Yakomeje atangaza ko bibutsa abana b’abakobwa ko mu muco umwari yiyubahaga akirinda gusamara no kwiyandarika, ntabe biri hanze, kuburyo azagera igihe cyo ku rushinga yarahesheje ishema n’agaciro umuryango we.
Vital Migabo yanibukije kandi ko amategeko agena ko abagiye ku rushinga bagomba kuba bipimishije agakoko gatera sida kugirango hatazagira uwanduza mugenzi we, ndetse anibutsa ko ubu amategeko anemerera gusezerana abasazwe babana, ariko batarasezeranye ku rwego rw’amategeko.
Ibi byose bigaragaza ko nta cyiza kiri mu gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbere yo kurushinga, kuko tutaretse n’ibyo twavuze haruguru hari n’abakora imibonano mpuzabitsina n’abakobwa bakabatera inda, nyuma bakabitakana, ibi bikagira ingaruka cyane cyane ku bakobwa, abahungu bigaramiye kandi akenshi ari bo ba nyirabayazana.
Mureke twimakaze urukundo nyarwo, twimike ubudahemuka turwaye gusamara no kwiyandarika, maze umwari w’u Rwanda asubire kuba umutereka amata, umususurutsa ruhimbi, asubire kuba wa mwari wari nk’amata, utarasogongerwaga.
Roger Marc Rutindukanamurego
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impavnu zabyo zo ni nyishi mubigaragara umuco waracitse. ingero:umubyeyi ntatinya kubikora abana be bareba,(nkizo ndaya mwavuze haruguru),ikoranabuhanga(amamfirime y urukoza soni abana birirwa bareba(prographi),gukunda ibintu kutanyurwa aho umukobwa ashukishwa amafaranga ngo abone ibigezweho adafite(iwabo badafitiye ubushobozi. igisture kitagikora kubabyeyi kuburyo buhagije urugero ahoifura igwa mwiryo kosa ugasanga nabandi barabikoze ese uwo wambere iwabo bagaragajae gisture ki kuburyo abandi babihugwa?,imiryango heshi yarazimye aho usanga umwana afite ishingano zo kurera abana bagenzi be uzahana undi ninde? ,ingo zitabanye neza aho umwe mubashakanye aca inyuma undi kdi ngo uwiba aheste aba abwiriza uwo mumugongo ahubwo twibaze ifura nizigabanuka cyane abazajya babyiruka aho hafi yabose ntibazirundmuriramo bikamera nkisodomo nagomora? nibakumire haboneke ibihano (amategekokubigendanye n uburaya) umana akure ayazi urugero:gutwarainda mukigo ngora muco(cyabagore gusa0 UWATEYE INDA PANA GUTANGA INDEZO GUSA HABONEKE N IKINDI GIHANO KUBURYO ABANTU BACUKIRA KUBIGIRA IBIKINO NAHO UBUNDI TWZISANGA AHANTUI KUBURYO KUHAVA BIGOYE CYANE KUKO ISURA Y UBUMUNTU IRIKUGENDA IHANGIRIKIRA URUGERO MURE IBIRI KUBERA MUMIRYANGO KESHI N URWO RUREREKANE RURI KUGENDA RUTWATAKA UMUNSI AMAZI YARENZE INKOMBE BIZABA BIMEZE BITE?
thanx ruti ntibikwiye pe
ikibabaje nuko abasore batemerako hari abakobwa bazima bariho,mukundana numusore agahita yumvako mwatangira kubaho nkumugabo numugore wabyanga bikaba ibindi abakobwa mubona bakuze ntabagabo akenshi nicyo kibibatera,kuko abasore bose niko babaye! abakobwa twarumiwe natwe. IMANA izatwihere abasore bayo bitonda kuko irabafite!
murakoze.
ikibabaje nuko abasore batemerako hari abakoobwa bazima bariho,mukundana numusore agahita yumvako mwatangira kubaho nkumugabo numugore wabyanga bikaba ibindi abakobwa mubona bakuze ntabagabo akenshi nicyo kibibatera,kuko abasore bose niko babaye! abakobwa twarumiwe natwe IMANA izatwihere abasore bayo bitonda kuko irabafite!
murakoze.
baratumva se? ikibabaje kandi usanga kinategeye againda nuko abenshi izo nda baziteresha kugirango abao basore babatware mumago, ariko bajya batekerezo kungo zabo uko zizaba zubatse ntarukundo namba! umuntu azagutwara kugira ngo agukure mumenyo ngo yabasetse da! ariko nawe uko azajya abyibuka ukekako bizajya biba byiza murugo rwanyu, erega ahanini uku kwiyandarika biterwa no kutigirira ikizere, ikindi kuba pessimist imbere habo bakumva bahafitiye ikizere, ikindi ngo ni ukubagarira yose biatabahesha agaciro