Hari n’uwo uzasanga akora uko ashoboye agakora ku muhungu cyangwa agahora ashaka kuba hafi y’aho umuhungu ari. Kandi n’ubwo atari we ufata iya mbere ngo akubwire ko yagukunze, agerageza kubikwereka ashyira ikiganza cye hafi y’icyawe kugira ngo nawe utinyuke ufate ikiganza cye. Iyo uri ikigwari ni hahandi usanga igitima kidundaguza wibaza uti se nimufata ikiganza akanyiyama!

Niba umukobwa agukunda, iyo umwegereye cyangwa ukamufata ku rutugu cyangwa ku kuboko ntabwo aguhunga. Icyitonderwa! Nubona bimeze bityo, ntuzashyekerwe ngo urengere usange utangiye kumubuza uburyo, kuko ibintu bishobora kuguhindukana ukumirwa.

2. Ntajya yibagirwa ibyo muganira

Iyo umukobwa akunda umuhungu, usanga anezezwa no kumutega amatwi kandi akabyerekana agarura ibiganiro bagiranye mu minsi yatambutse; hari n’igihe agenda ashyiramo utugambo dusekeje agendeye ku bintu mwaganiriyeho bimwerekeyeho. N’utuntu tw’amafuti mwaganiriye usanga atuzirikana kuko iyo agukunda, ibyawe byose biramushishikaza.

Ahora iteka atekereza kuri gahunda zawe. Niba se hari umukino ukomeye witegura, cyangwa se ufite akazi kihutirwa ugomba kurangiza ku gihe ntarengwa, ibyo byose arabizirikana kandi akibuka kukwifuriza gutsinda. Hari n’igihe yemera akirinda kukurogoya akaguha umwanya wo kwitegura neza.

3. Uzamutungura kenshi arimo kukureba utabizi

Iyo uri kumwe na bagenzi bawe, umukobwa ugukunda na we ari hafi aho, usanga anyuzamo akagutereraho akajisho mu buryo butunguranye, ibi kandi abikora azi neza ko wowe utaribumubone, kandi iyo muhuje amaso, ahita yirebera hirya hato utagira ngo ni wowe yarebaga, icyo gihe ukamenya ko yakwihebeye ariko bikamutera isoni kubishyira ku mugaragaro. Muri make iyo umukobwa akwemera, usanga aho uri hose yifuza kukureba, yaba abigambiriye cyangwa bikikora.

4. Agushakira umwanya

Ikimenyetso simusiga kikwereka ko umukobwa akwiyumvamo: Akora uko ashoboye akakubonera umwanya muri gahunda ze zihutirwa” nk’uko byemezwa na Margot Schulman, wanditse igitabo kitwa Choose Love: A Simple Path to Healthy, Joyful Relationships. Mu Kinyarwanda: Hitamo urukundo: Inzira yoroshye igana ku rukundo ruzira amakemwa.

Kuba umukobwa akubonera umwanya muri gahunda ze, hari abantu babifata nk’ibisanzwe, nyamara ni bwo buryo bwa mbere mu bundi bwose bwerekana ko umukobwa akwiyumvamo.

Indi mpuguke mu birebana n’umubano, Bonnie Winston nawe arabyemeza agira ati “Iyo umukobwa akubonera umwanya kenshi, ni ikimenyetso cy’uko agukunda, kwaba ari ukubonana imbonankubone, kuvugana kuri telefone, cyangwa mu butumwa bugufi kandi bushimishije. “Ese ubundi atagukunda, ibyo byose yaba abikorera iki?”

5. Akora uko ashoboye ngo umenye ko nta wundi bakundana

Igihe murimo kuganira, umukobwa wifuza ko mucudika ntagira isoni zo kukubwira ko nta nshuti y’umuhungu afite. Ariko ibyo byonyine ntibihagije, na we ugomba gukoresha uwo mwanya ukahava umenye ko agufitiye ubwuzu. Naramuka avuze ko akeneye umuntu umuherekeza mu birori runaka cyangwa gusohokana mugasangira, uzahite ufatiraho wigeragereze amahirwe kuko ni bwo buryo azaba abonye bwo kukwisanzuraho.

Uwaba yaracikanywe, yasura umurongo wa KT Radio kuri youtube (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCoTgDGyQpkDyL_eUKtt9q7g), aho mushobora gukurikira ibiganiro byinshi biba byaratambutse kuri KT Radio nka: Ubyumva ute, Inyanja twogamo, Nyiringanzo, Nyiringanzo, inama z’ubuzima n’ubumenyi rusange ndetse n’ibindi.
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MENYA UMWANDITSI

Gasana Marcellin

Umunyamakuru

@ Gasana_M

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